I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
