How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
