I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
