So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
