her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Randomize
