btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
