You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
