Dual....:-)
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
