Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
