you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
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