Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
