just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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