Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
