Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
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