I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
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