Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
