operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
