the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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