I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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