I feel like I'm in dance class right now
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize
