I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize