Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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