Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
