why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
This gyro tastes like lonliness
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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