Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
