Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
