In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
