what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
