I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
