Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(512): View more from Texas

my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??

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(775): View more from Nevada

At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on

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(914): View more from New York

He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF

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(503): View more from Oregon

Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Technically my penis started a fight tonight

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(425): View more from Washington

I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge

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(937): View more from Ohio

Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.

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