White coat. Heels.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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