Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
