i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
