My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Randomize
