ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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