turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
