My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Randomize