I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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