Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
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