I bet he comes in French.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
