we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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