Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
