U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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