im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Randomize
