Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize