He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
