Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
