as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
