if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
