Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
